Talk to a Consultant
How Can a Consultant Help?
We all are "experts" because we all have the inner wisdom to help ourselves and one another in times of loss. We just need empathy which means getting in touch with our feelings and needs. How did we feel about our companion before they died or sickened? How do we feel now? What needs did the companions meet of ours when he or she was alive and well? What needs of ours are currently not being met? One of the best ways to get clear about our feelings and needs is to tell someone about our loss and they can offer empathy by listening. Anyone can listen, even the individual who has suffered the loss. You can self-empathize through dreams, through journaling, through writing stories, and by hearing yourself speak to others. Sometimes though it is helpful to speak with someone who knows about animal companion loss and who can listen with empathy and perhaps, if requested, offer suggestions on how to handle the grief. If you'd like some empathetic listening and companionship during your journey of mourning you may contact Rev. LoraKim Joyner, D.V.M. at lorakim@lafeberwingsofcompassion.com.
During these email conversations you may ask questions regarding grief and loss, or simply request an empathetic presence. Rev. Dr. Joyner will return your email within 1-2 days and all correspondence will be kept confidential, unless you'd like to share your story, question, and response with others.
A Reader Asks
Dear LoraKim,
I have had several birds keep me company over the years and many have died. I was always sad when they died, but in no way was I prepared for the loss of my beloved Jack, a Yellow-naped Amazon. When he died last month it was as if part of me had died and I have been depressed ever since. What's going on with me?
Annie Smith
Rev. Dr. Joyner Replies
Dear Annie,
I hear that your Jack was very special to you and that you feel confused as to how hard this has been for you. How each of us grieves depends on so many different things - past losses, the unique relationship we have with each being in our lives, and current issues/stresses in our lives. Grief may result in depression and other physical and mental alternations, and if you have concern, please see a physician or professional in healing and health. In the meantime I invite you to make space in your life for the process of grieving and healing. Perhaps you can journal? In your journal you can write stories of Jack describing how you love him, how beautiful he was, and the things you did together. Sharing our memories with others may also help. You can put your story of Jack on our website, as well as join our email list serve where you can talk to others of your loss, and of the beauty that Jack brought to your life. I would enjoy hearing more of Jack as well - do you have a picture you can send me?
With deep hope of healing,
LoraKim